Its certainly nothing profound to say that we are struggle with fear. Fear is the most innate emotion humans have. According to places on the internet (to lazy to cite anything this morning) Humans are born with a fear of heights and of loud or sudden noises. If I were more pessimistic I could even say that we spend the entirety of life becoming afraid of more things. Anyway, back to me.
I have spent the better part of a week now being in fear of...well...what I perceive to be my calling. I believe that I have been called to be a warrior in the war on truth. I believe that I am an ambassador for the Kingdom of God just like every believer. I believe that, along with the great commission that I am learning to live out, I am to stand for the Truth as scripture has it. I may have done a poor job explaining that but I do not want to get to far off topic. To sum it up, absolute truth of the kingdom is under assault and I believe I am called to stand against false teachings and lies. I also believe this stand against all that is false is in the job description for all Christians due to the multiple urgings in the New testament to stand against false teachers and teachings.
Anyway, back to fear. This fear began with watching how The Zimmerman trial divided the country. I watched as it practically became criminal to agree with the verdict and as my friends tore each other apart. As I have grown up, having an opinion is now the right we all have. The issue is though that having an opinion doesn't mean you are right. An opinion can be wrong. I have heard a number of times people say that, when confronted with truth or a differing opinion, "Well you believe what you believe and I'll believe what I believe." It is a prideful statement. Truth has become relevant and it does not seem to bother anyone. Truth is absolute. There is right and there is wrong with no in-between. This makes for hard, unpopular decisions and divides many. With what I have written so far I have no doubt raised objections in whoever might be reading this. Society has turned the pursuit of truth into the pursuit of whatever helps us stomach our lives.
This is what scares me. I hate that something that seems so simple to me for whatever reason divides friends and destroys relationships. If speaking truth is so inflammatory, EVEN AMONG CHRISTIANS, MY OWN BROTHERS AND SISTERS, then why do it? How do I do it? Geez how does anyone do it?
I am familiar with the scriptures where Jesus says they hated him first and stuff. I understand standing for things that are true alienates you from the world. I guess the Zimmerman stuff just brought it to the forefront of my mind. Over a year ago when the it all went down, I thought it was clear cut what happened and forgot about it. Next thing I know there is a trial and protests. I find out our president has egregiously spoken out of place concerning the trial. Now people and celebrities are boycotting THE STATE OF FLORIDA. In the words of Stewie Griffen, "What the hell man!"
All due to different perceptions of truth that people have and an unwillingness to accept fact. Probably the only thing more inflammatory than race is religion, right where I believe the purpose of my life is parked. I am probably just overwhelmed. I wish there was more love in the world more than ever before. Maybe I am just waking up. I do not know. I do know that I am missing community in a bad way. I do know that I am forever sided with God and His Kingdom, and that one day, God willing a long time away, it will mean my death. And that is fine. The Lord is just breaking me in I think.
I could use your prayers and even your thoughts. This post seems jumbled but it is really just an accurate representation of how my mind has been the last week. Thank you for taking the time to read.
In Him,
Marshall
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